So Many Changes, So Much Goodness

For a long time, I never really knew that this ~ life, parenting ~ could feel so good. Now I know that this is actually just the beginning.

And what I really, deeply know (which I’ve known and has only became true through the day in and day out) is this:

If I’m doing ok, my kids are doing ok. The better I am, the better they are.

And yes, having parenting strategies is important. And... I can only really ever implement them when I’m good, really good, like good in the 'best me' way.

This isn't new; you've heard me say it before. And even though I’ve been talking about this for a while, and this is what I’ve focused on with my clients as a Parenting Coach, I've begun diving much deeper into this piece of the journey; the healing of self.

Because that's where my calling lies ~ where it has always been. And I'm now (finally) fully embracing this, which means I can bring so much more to you.

I’m doing this in several ways: with SongMantras (which I've shared with you) and with intuitive energy healing modalities ~ Energy Clearing, Psychic Messaging, and Shamanic Healing. Each of these allows me to assist and guide you in living your life in the most authentic, best feeling way.

I thank you so very much for your presence here. Truly. So much gratitude to you for walking this part of your path with me. If this shift doesn't resonate for you, I invite you to unsubscribe.

However, I do warmly invite you to stay with me on this journey. You can do that by staying right here, where I'll share more about this practice as it blossoms. I will always share about my parenting journey, how I use my work with my children, and how my own growing and deepening translates into their beautiful growth.

Either way, know that I appreciate you. And know that you are not broken. You are beautiful and perfect and learning.

As always, much much love.

In Truth,
xoNatanya

Find your peace

I am sooo excited to share this with you!

It starts with a story (and ends with a gift for you :) ... a few months ago, I was driving home from an amazing conference. I was inspired and motivated, and generally feeling good.

While driving, I was thinking about the practices that I use to support myself as a mama, and feeling grateful for them. All of a sudden ~ out of nowhere ~ I started hearing a chant playing in my head (no other word for it, though I've since created one... read on ;) 

It wasn't anything I had heard before. It was startling (and amazing). Then, I heard another chant, and another... I grabbed my phone and started recording, and by the end of the drive, I had 8 chants!

I started using them ~ when I became frustrated with my kids, when I was driving and noticed myself feeling anxious, when I was stressed for any reason ~ I would repeat them to myself. And they worked. Every time. My heart rate slowed, my stress level went down, and I felt more at peace than ever before.

Then, I started sharing them with friends and colleagues, and the response has been overwhelming. People love them. 

Kids love them, too ~ my boys ask me to sing them frequently. A colleague was listening to one when her daughter walked into the room. They listened to it together, and a bit later she heard her daughter singing it to herself in her room (how great is that :)  It was the one I'm gifting to you today ~ 'I Am Peace'.

And so, I decided it was time to start recording and sharing them with you. I'm calling them SongMantras™, and you can either listen to them, or chant them yourself (or chant along while you listen ;)

The first one is ready to go, and is focused on bringing inner peace to your holiday season.

You can listen to it here.

This is really a take-it-with-you tool. Download it onto your phone to listen at any time you need, or simply repeat it to yourself when you could use a breather. 

It's perfect for managing those times when you feel your frustration rising with your kids. And the more you use it, the more profound the results.

I wish you the very best holiday season and entry into the New Year. May it be filled with peace, joy, and love. Truly.

xoNatanya

And the good news is...

I've shared so much with you about parenting challenges. I've told my own stories, and those of others (with their permission, of course.)

So, it only seems right to share the great stuff when it happens, too :)

This is one of those times.

Yesterday was parent/teacher conferences at my children's school. I'll start by saying that I LOVE their school. I have done everything I can to keep them in the independent school they've attended for the past 5 years.

I have worked 50-60 hour weeks (much of it at night, so I can be with them after school.) I took on the position of School Board Chair when nobody else wanted it, and held the position for 5 years ~ guiding the struggling (though stellar) school into a thriving learning center, with preschool through middle school students (all so it would stay open, for my kids to attend ;) I insisted on keeping my children there, against the advice of those near and dear to me.

This was the day it all payed off.

Both teachers' reports were glowing.

Gabriel, who struggled with social interactions last year, has been taking the lead in classroom discussions, excelling academically, and deftly navigating the tricky waters between social norms and valuing his own unique inclinations.

Isaac is a classroom mediator and a light of joy and enthusiasm in the school. He is persevering and making leaps in his reading and writing, despite challenges with reversing letters.

Of course, I see positive changes at home as well. But to know they are translating into the school environment is amazing, after the challenges of the past few years.

Even with parenting fail after parenting fail (as well as successes ;) my children are thriving. My deepest intuition knew what they needed to support them through the difficult years of their parents' separation. And it was totally worth it.

The takeaway here is TRUST your intuition. LISTEN to the inner voice that guides your choices, and HONOR what you know is best for your family.

Thank you for coming along on this journey with me. I'm thrilled to have you here.

xoNatanya
 

Here we go again...

Ever feel like motherhood is a position where the job description keeps changing, and you weren't given the proper training? (raises hand)

Seriously ~ even with years of study, training, coaching, and on-the-job experience, I still feel like that more often than I like.

I'm going to keep saying this until it happens... we have to be talking about this, mama!

I was just away for a week ~ the longest I've been gone. My mom watched the boys for some of the time, their dad for some time, and my brother for a bit. Everyone said how awesome and helpful they were (always good to hear, right?) 

So what's the first thing that happened on the day I returned (after flying a redeye all night, ug)?

Total. melt. down.

Not surprising, and honestly I should have been prepared for it. But I was tired and so happy to see them, I thought that would be enough. It wasn't.

My first night back, the boys started wrestling instead of cleaning up after dinner, and didn't listen when I asked for their help several times, so I finally stopped asking. But when they realized they had played well into bedtime and lost the opportunity for dessert (yes, they were given plenty of warning about the time) they lost it, wailing, lashing out, you name it.

With the time for reading books before bed fast running out, they pulled it together and we made it through the night. But alas, the antagonizing re-emerged first thing in the morning and escalated quickly (such a yucky way to start the day, bleah.)

This is where I would coach you to take deep breaths, to use a sensory tool or mindfulness practice of some kind. And I'm happy to say that often, I do. But not this day.

This day, I yelled. Super-tired crazypants mama yelled. And it totally sucked. BUT instead of getting all down on myself, feeling guilty and ashamed afterwards, I apologized.

BAM.

I apologized. I acknowledged that it was not okay for me to yell, and that I know it's scary for them when I do. I let them know I didn't like what they were doing, but it still wasn't okay for me to act that way.

It happens to us all.

I'll say it again, it happens to us all.

So yes, I have a bunch of different approaches to use when I get upset and triggered. I work super hard to use them. And sometimes, I'm human and I make mistakes.

I made extra sure to give them positive attention for the rest of the day ~ because in the end all they really want is my attention, and they'll get it one way or another :)

It's a good thing to talk about this stuff. We need to know we're not alone. And you're always welcome to shoot me an email to share your story, I'm happy to be witness for you. No judgment here.

xoNatanya
 

Who do you tell?

How are you, really?

I've been having conversations about this recently. About how we try to be, and how we really are. About how we say we are, and how we really are. About who we trust enough to say how we really are. About whether we even admit it to ourselves.

Mama, we all need each other. We need to create the space to hold the truth of how we are. Of what's wonderful, and what sucks.  So we can witness each other, be witnessed, and continue to move in the direction of our dreams.

Our dreams. Not our socially pressured expectations. The dreams of what we really want, for ourselves, for our children, for our lives.

So, how are you, really?

Me, well ~ some days I'm awesome, and some days not so much. Some days I got it covered, and some days I need my support system like I need food and water.

Do I let it all hang out with everyone? No. But I have created safe spaces where I can, because I know what happens if I don't (and it ain't pretty).

This is why I'm here for you. This is my purpose: to connect with and support amazing mamas to move in the direction of their dreams.

If you're even a bit curious about how that can happen, I'd love to share something I just created ~ mini coaching. It's a great way to dip your toe in, get a jump start, discover what it feels like to be supported and take steps in the direction of yourdreams.

With so much love,
xoNatanya