a BIG aha!

As I wrote recently, my son Gabriel has been struggling a bit emotionally.  Of course, I've been trying to help him in every way that I can ~ that he'll let me ;)

Recently, we had a conversation that was so awesome,  I shared with the participants in my class.  And I thought you would appreciate hearing about it too!

Gabriel and I were snuggling before bedtime, talking about a story we had just read.  The story was about making choices, and how the choices we make can sometimes be influenced by what people say to or about us.  This led to a conversation about how what we believe influences everything we do (yes, I did say he's 7:) 

He was so into it!  So, I took it a step further.  I showed him the hand model of the brain (if you haven't heard me talk about this, you can see Dr. Daniel Siegel's video explanation here.) 

And, here's the kicker... we talked about how neural pathways are formed.  I asked him to imagine sledding in fresh snow, how the path gets deeper each time you go over it, and once the path is really deep it's hard to go off the path in a different direction, but it can be done.

I explained that this is why it was so challenging for me to change my parenting for so long, but over time I established new neural pathways, so now my habits are different. 

He looked at me and said "OH!  Now I get it!"  It was a.mazing. 

Since then, he has referred to the hand model of the brain a few times, without prompting.  It really made an impression.  And, research has shown that just being aware of how your brain works changes how it processes. 

And that's what I wanted to share with you, to let you know that even though it might seem impossible to change your parenting, it can be done.  

Have patience, and forgive yourself.  Every day.

xoxo Natanya